I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
where am i from again
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
