It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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