I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
you never un-have a 4some
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Randomize
