I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
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