I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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