they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
