is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
