He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
I see more hoeing in ur future
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
