I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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