i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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