No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
