I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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