did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
