Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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