You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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