yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
