would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
