do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
