gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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