I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he thought i was a dude.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Randomize
