just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize
