I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
