How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I think I won the penis lottery.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
