so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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