pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
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