I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Randomize
