wanna go halves on a baby?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
So vagazzling was a success
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Randomize
