Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize