Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
