Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize
