I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Fuck appropriateness.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
where does the pee come out of this thing
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Randomize
