Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
