you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
