Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
