new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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