Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Randomize
