Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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