id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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