I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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