i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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