I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
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