Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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