so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
