So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I'm always down for nudity.
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