You made me cry and you don't even care
Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
