Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
