Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
What changed your mind?
Being sober
this hospital has no fireball
I am one with the molecules
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
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