Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
