So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I think my fart just growled at me.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Sober January is a disaster.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
