He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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